April 2007

Do-it-yourself Stereotyping

Monday, April 23rd, 2007

There is an all-Italian team in P’s indoor league.  They couldn’t be more typical if they were custom-ordered from an ethnic stereotype catalog.  Names like Tony and Frank? Check. Dark, curly hair? Churlish temperaments? Check and check.  Oh, and did I mention we’re in New Jersey, too? 

There is a set of twins–one goalie, the other captain—whose voices are pretty deep and resonant. It’s the voice of God, if God is Foghorn Leghorn’s Barnyard Dawg.

Looney Tunes Collector's Edition: Canine Corps

They are thick and violent and not very clever, and are apt to form threatening groups on and off the field, warning refs or opponents to “ betta watch your back!” One night, some of the other team’s groupies got rowdy, and Voice Of God thundered, “I guess SOME guys don’t know how to control their women, huh!”

What am I supposed to do with that? It’s like someone is handing out free prejudice samples.

Also? Europeans are awesome.  I just saw a tourist with a Dooney & Bourke fanny pack, styled somewhere between an apron and a carpenter’s tool belt.

The angel and devil dismounted from my shoulders for a photo shoot.

Friday, April 20th, 2007

Hijinks

Friday, April 20th, 2007

For the stocking was not the only accessory our dear Mr. Rowatt lacked. His head had been completely severed from his torso, and was nowhere to be found.”

Defective Yeti and the Lost writers do Sherlock Holmes.

Bracelets I will make

Wednesday, April 18th, 2007

What Wouldn’t Jesus Do?

Bumper stickers I will make

Wednesday, April 18th, 2007

I support my own weight.