Sometimes I just have to give credit for great subject lines:
Penis theft panic hits city
Not sure what they are selling, but I almost think we ought to buy it.
UPDATE: Perhaps it occurred at this restaurant.
UPDATE 2: No, it’s for real!!
April 2008
Spam of the Day
Tuesday, April 29th, 2008For Fifi, who loves the pandas.
Thursday, April 24th, 2008sola snottae
Wednesday, April 23rd, 2008I have Calvinist phlegm. It holds me close and never lets me go, and no one can snatch me out of its hand.
“Listen, I’m on my lady business and I WILL cut you”
Wednesday, April 16th, 2008If you don’t read Jezebel.com, you should. Here’s a post on why women try so hard to hide the fact that–like every other woman in the world–they have periods. The title is from my favorite comment by one of the readers.
Personally, I’m no longer afraid to look a male cashier in the eye while buying supplies, but I certainly keep the lid on the whole thing in general otherwise. Am still working on getting painkillers from the medicine cabinet in the maleroom (well, it is!) at work, but I feel equally embarassed to get bandaids or cold meds there. Why should everyone know that I have any medical needs at all? Since I am forever walking by the mailroom anyway to the bathroom next door, I pretty much already feel outed by my bodily functions.
Tuesday, April 15th, 2008
Dear Ringwood,
I no longer live there. You may have noticed when you addressed your “where to vote in Ringwood” notice to me in Montclair. Please address all future correspondence to actual residents of your fair borough.
Many thanks,
Jtango
Gaylords say no
Sunday, April 6th, 2008I didn’t believe P when he told me gaylords are real. I still sort of think he made them up and maybe even fabricated some websites just to play a joke on me, but you can’t make up Wikipedia!
oh, wait.
(Pretend there is a link here to the clip in The Office where Tim and Dawn play the “gaylords say no” trick on Gareth. Because I couldn’t find it on YouTube.)
Shameless self-promotion and recycling
Sunday, April 6th, 2008April’s theme for NaBloPoMo is letters. I’ve been thinking about posting some samples of emails I’ve written or received, which means I don’t have to go to the work of writing up a post, but can enjoy editing previously written material. I like to do that.
Here is what I sent to my sister after finding out that her now-husband asked her to be his girlfriend:
HELL, YES. I am so unbelievably happy for you, my
dearest of dears. I want to tell p right away. he’ll
be thrilled, too.
so, that must leave you floating on air. how cute and
awkward he is. are you gonna tell mom? last night
she lit into me about “committment” and “physical
intimacy” and expressed her disappointment that i keep
making the same mistakes over and over again. Ugh. it
was too big to tackle, but she seemed somewhat
mollified when i told her we were committed to each
other and on one else for dating as long as that
lasted, and that marriage looks fine from here,etc.
Argh. She doesn’t even make sense about what she is
hoping for.
But not to steal your thunder. If you tell, make it
soudn like there is some sort of contract between you
and that purity is high on the list.
-May ‘04