You’ve got to admire the Japanese for their committment to keeping a clean undercarriage. Even public bathrooms and fast food restaurants have a shiny, automatic toilet equipped with a multi-function bidet. I tend to think of the bidet as a sort of nifty relic you’d find in a really old house, not a high-tech gadget you find in a high-tech country. Maybe your granny has one in her bathroom and keeps it covered with a crocheted potty cozy.
But this-
-this is a NASA potty.

knit himself a lip sweater

Satan in a Sunday hat

or I will CUT a bitch

Well, shit the bed!

Don’t give me that puckered-anus-face of yours.

a metric fuck ton