My new magenta sports bra turned me bright, streaky pink, like some kind of borscht-dispensing wet nurse.

Oh dear!

Even footballers are susceptible to Rabid Possum Hair.

I just moderated some would-be comments from several fine spammers, two of whom were named “Krasty” and “Vintage Pee Coat.” Hee, hee.

Krasty Gogo, was that you?

1. No more nookie till after Xmas. Yes, I know you don’t care, but I enjoyed phrasing it that way.

2. Everything you ever wanted to know about urinals, ladies. And men, in case you need to brush up on your stance and etiquette. No peeking, no chatting, no excessive shaking.

3. Robot Christmas dance. It’s almost heartwarming, but reminds me a little too much of interpretive worship dances.

4. A Noisy Alphabet. Artist friends: acquire rights and make me some ABC blocks for my future offspring.

5. Epic Xmas card. Which reminds me: I should start sending those out soon. Humbug.

Found this at Waxin’ and Milkin’, which is an amazing collection of images.

Muppet Sam the Eagle and David Lynch.

It’s not the first time the comparison has been made, but this shot of the Pope on a windy day last month really drives it home.

Seems right for a Wednesday. Mine, by the way, made me furious, but I beat it all to death on the treadmill. Perhaps it’s the Be Joyful in All Things, Dammit! Christian upbringing in me, but I feel I should atone for my churlishness by noting the following Graces:

1. Nancy Grace on that stupid HLN channel playing constantly on the TVs at my gym has been all abuzz about the recent gang rape in Richmond, CA. Thinking about this on the treadmill today made me spitting mad, and I ran and ran faster and ran harder and was determined not ever to be a victim of crimes against women. I’m fortunate to have health and stamina and the means to train my body to run and kick and punch. I rarely find myself in unsafe settings, and I have a fierce sense of knowing exactly what I don’t have to put up with.

2. Anniversaries. We had our fourth this year, Assers her first, J3 celebrates three today, and my brother-in-law hits two next month.

3. Library trip today. This is pretty much my favorite place to go ever (It’s full of books. That you can take for free. I know!), but I almost never go. As soon as I’m done writing this damned blog, I’m going to go to bed with Bernard Cornwell. Oh, yeah.

4. The World Series is almost over! Can’t wait till Facebook is once again a wasteland of Here’s My Baby!, I Didn’t Get Enough Sleep Last Night, and I’m Getting Sick status updates. Sheesh.

5. Business is good. I hope you get the ad with the guy who “GOT RIPPED IN 4 WEEKS.” Is he wearing flesh-colored Hulk gloves?

More at WildAmmo.

In the words of my generation:

1. DO NOT WANT

2. Shun!

3. Hide

4. Unfollow!

1. Too many fruit flies! Make trap, set bait.

2. Ha! I win.

3. Damn. Forgot about fruit flies being the superheroes of reproduction. Now I have a jar full of larvae.